One of society’s most common images of men is the “knight in shining armor” – a fearless, emotionless, aggressive warrior, heavily armored both physically and mentally. The notion of “masculine men” dates back millenia to hunters, vikings, warriors, etc. It has been a critical part of many societies throughout history. Across various different time periods and civilizations, a common theme of different expectations for women and men has almost always emerged. Men in the stone ages were expected to be the hunters who hunted animals to provide food for the family, while modern men are expected to work hard and support their family financially. However, the nature of masculinity, and more broadly the role that men should play in society, has become a controversial issue in recent years. Long-held ideas about gender roles receive greater and greater skepticism. New research in psychology, biology, and healthcare, reveals a dark picture of the effects of stereotypical masculinity on men. Toxic masculinity, the societal phenomenon through which men are expected to display stereotypical “toughness” and “bravery,” amongst other characteristics, causes considerable harm to both men and women.
Society pushes certain unhealthy expectations onto men starting at a very young age, which lasts throughout their lives leading to suppression of emotions and inability to cope with them in a healthy manner. One study of a group of 204 adults found that participants shown the same video of a baby crying were more likely to describe the child as “angry” when told it was male, but more likely to call it “scared” when told it was female (Holloway 957). Evidently, many people consciously or subconsciously make major judgements based on nothing other than gender. Males, even those who are infants, are seen in a negative light when they appear emotional. This study’s findings are augmented by the research of psychologist Terry Real, who highlights numerous studies on the topic in his 1998 book I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression. Real found that parents project “a diminished need for comfort, protection, and affection onto male children” (Holloway 957). This underscores the unconscious bias towards males even when infants display no gender biased behavior. As the primary influence on their children, this behavior of parents no doubt significantly impacts male children as they mature. As young boys grow older, these concepts of masculinity initially projected onto them by their parents are reinforced by society at-large in school and elsewhere. Boys are taught to value “confidence, strength, success, and composure” (“Depression in Men”). Though ostensibly positive attributes, these ideas often cause stress and harm for men later in life. It highlights that male children, starting at an early age, are negatively compared to girls when they express emotion. This treatment further fortifies men into stereotypically unhealthy masculine personalities.
These heavily pushed societal ideas of masculinity often cause severe psychological and physical health issues in men. The repetition of “gender-defining thinking” to young men, and the promotion of typically masculine values causes men to “bottle-up” their sadness. This can lead to dysfunctional emotional expression and ultimately, depression (“Depression in Men”). Psychological issues such as depression can be extremely harmful for men, potentially affecting their daily life and leading to difficulties in health and in the worst cases, suicide. The harmful effects of toxic masculinity extend to physical health as well. Men are well known to have vastly different experiences in healthcare than women, with “men being significantly less likely to seek preventative care” (Ferdman 962). This causes unnecessary damage to health. Furthermore, when in the lab, “men with higher reported scores of masculinity reported fewer symptoms, particularly when reporting to a male interviewer” (Ferdman 961). The combination of men actively preferring male doctors but reporting fewer symptoms is the perfect recipe for inaccurate diagnoses for men which causes unfavorable health outcomes. Toxic masculinity which is associated with the idea of physical toughness leads to men underrepresenting their pain which can lead to severe health complications.
Harmful societal notions of masculinity also clearly frequently translate to serious negative effects for both men and women at work and in relationships. Toxic masculinity can cause men to place a heavy focus on their monetary value, leading them to overwork themselves. One study found that over one-third of men believed that taking paternity leave would “‘jeopardize their position’ at work” (Bobrow 966). This toxic work driven attitude leads to a burden on mothers who have to raise children by themselves. It causes relationships issues where men are emotionally absent in the house and often feel like strangers in their own home. The idea that masculinity implies toughness and resilience naturally leads to a belief that men should not need breaks such as paternity leave. This is supported by a study that found “in California, three quarters of all workers who took advantage of a law allowing paid leave to new parents were women” (Bobrow 966). This “workaholic” attitude likely often causes severe detriment to both the men and their children, and can contribute to the aforementioned psychological and health effects. The fundamental feature of men to be the breadwinners and keep up with their boss’s demands leads to disparity and stress. These tendencies of unhealthy work-life balance likely stems from school where males students often “run into a wall when they confront novel academic and personal issues” due to an inability to be vulnerable (Monaghan). It causes severe harm to these male students when they forgo help for their problems due to toxic masculinity as they might seem “weak” for asking for help. This leads to poor academic performance, a noxious mindset, and a fear of expression of emotions. However some argue that toxic masculinity is nonexistent and society needs more ‘masculine men’. They argue that academics are “trying to further emasculate young men instead of, you know, teaching them to be gentlemen” (Minitor 963). However, this does not appear to be the case. Men in college often associate masculinity with binge drinking, making rash decisions, maximizing sexual encounters, and an overall disregard for self-care. This directly affects their academic performance where females outperform males. But college programs that teach men to properly deal with emotion or personal issues have significantly improved mens’ well being. This is supported by the “male to female four year graduation disparity drop of 3 points, to 14%” (Monaghan). The program deconstructs traditional masculine traits that lead to disruptiveness, self-harm, and aggression. Establishment of programs and their bold results only conform with the idea that toxic masculinity exists and harms men by hindering their ability to cope with their feelings.
The lifelong societal push towards traditional masculinity felt by men causes extreme detriment to them, both in their personal lives and in professional environments such as work and college. The toxic idea of masculinity which is associated with machismo, unconditional physical toughness, and stoicism, leads to deleterious notions causing mental and physical harm. Toxic masculinity originates from societal expectations pushed on them from essentially as soon as they are born. These expectations are reinforced as children mature. As boys become men, these toxic expectations ultimately cause a plethora of harmful effects on their psychological and physical health effects. It can cause disruptive or dangerous behavior at schools and can even cause malicious effects on men’s work lives. This lifelong, centuries old cycle of toxic masculinity can only be ended with greater awareness from both men and women. College programs redefining masculinity and teaching men to deal with their emotions, laws protecting career status from taking parental leave, and a greater consciousness of the injurious societal expectations often put on men will help to create a better world: one where men are not afraid to seek help, and where they channel their energy and emotion in more open and constructive ways.
Works Cited
Bobrow, Emily. “The Man Trap.” The Language of Composition, edited by Shea, Renee H.,
et al., Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2019. pp. 965-967.
“DEPRESSION IN MEN: the of toxic masculinity: what is toxic masculinity and how does it
contribute to depression in men?” Sister Namibia, vol. 31, no. 1, Jan.-Mar. 2019, pp. 22+. Gale Academic OneFile Select, link.gale.com/apps/doc/A588991648/EAIM?u=dove10524&sid=bookmark-EAIM&xid=01a3474a. Accessed 2 Feb. 2022.
Ferdman, Roberto. “The Perils of Being Manly.’ The Language of Composition, edited by
Shea, Renee H., et al., Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2019. pp. 960-962.
Holloway, Kali. “Toxic Masculinity is Killing Men.” The Language of Composition, edited by Shea, Renee H., et al., Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2019. pp. 956-959.
Miniter, Frank. “The Hard, Adrenaline-Soaked Truth about “Toxic Masculinity.”” The
Language of Composition, edited by Shea, Renee H., et al., Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2019. pp. 963-964.
Monaghan, Peter. “The Fight Against ‘Toxic Masculinity.” The Chronicle of Higher
Education, vol. 64, no. 16, 15 Dec. 2017, pp. A8+. Gale Academic OneFile Select, link.gale.com/apps/doc/A521459033/EAIM?u=dove10524&sid=bookmark-EAIM&xid=b9221677. Accessed 3 Feb. 2022.
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